A Troubled Piece of Fruit [LP]

by Sparkbird

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Experience first-hand the stunning artwork by Rebecca DeMoss, printed on a case using Certified Green Components! I will sign the album to you or someone else, or just with my name, or not at all, as you desire! Oh, and if you want me to sign it to someone in particular, just send me a note through here or at stenance [at] gmail [dot] com.

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1.	I am not a stranger here 03:18	lyrics	buy track
I don’t know this town, But it’s your town— So it’s my town too; I don’t know that girl, But she knows you— So she’s my friend too; I don’t know my way, But I can count on you To show it to me; I am not a stranger When I’m with you, When I’m with you. (D-d-do do do do do.) Your mother seems to like me, And you tell me That it’s true; Your cousin makes me food That I have only ever Dreamed of trying!; I can tell that I Could be so happy here With you forever; I am not a stranger When I’m with you, When I’m with you. (D-d-do do do do d-d-do.) Your room is a cave That offers shelter from the stormy weather and Beneath a pile of blankets we can Hide away together, we can Hide away together, we can Hide away together, we can Hide away together, we can... When it’s time for me To up and leave, there’s A part of me I can’t make follow; All day long I’m longing for you, And the tears are so hard to swallow; After knowing Life with you, Life without you Leaves me hollow... oh... I don’t know my way, But I can count on you To show it to me; I am not a stranger When I’m with you, When I’m with you; I don’t know this road, But I can count on you To lead me down it; I am not a stranger When I’m with You, when I’m with You, when I’m with You, when I’m with You.
2.	Cuddlefish 02:18	lyrics	buy track
All my antics and my gibberish Put a damper on my sentences; I'm a [cuddlefish/cuttlefish] Trying to cover up my incompetence. Maybe your fancy just isn't ticklish— Maybe your heart belongs to another fish— But on your part that'd be foolish. Baby, I think you ought to think through this. The sea is big, big, big, And it's full of scary things! Like great white sharks, And colossal squid! And I'm worried about you... I don't want you to get hurt. I don’t want you to get hurt... I don’t want you to get hurt. If you love something (So they say) You should set it free. But I disagree— 'Cause I can safely say that Catching and releasing Isn't what I'd want for me. I know I know better than you do What is best for you to do— Can't you see the logic there? It's superlogical. My perspective is an outside one, And that's really saying something 'Cause we don't have mirrors And since we're under the water, There isn't a surface For you to see your reflection in... Not that you don't look nice! (In fact, how wonderful you look Is exactly what the problem is....) The sea is big, big, big, And it's full of scary things! Like great white sharks, And colossal squid! And I'm worried about you... I don't want you to get hurt. I don’t want you to get hurt... I don’t want you to get hurt. It guts me every time I hear you're frequenting Such sketchy dives. It's not like it's a crime, But what if you get caught by a scuba diver Just like Nemo and I can't find you? Still I'd never cease my quest for you— What else would there be for me to do? Sure, there are plenty of fishes in the ocean, But not one of them could ever get a hook in my devotion. So my love for you supports recent scholarly publications Reporting that fish have a greater capacity for memory Than was previously believed, And I will miss you for the rest of my life.
3.	Spring 02:48	lyrics	buy track
Spring, and still Leaves have not all fallen from the trees; Holding hands and skipping Stones across the river; Flowers open Wider than I've ever seen; You can see them too, If you hurry— You can see them too, If you come back to me. Spiral bound The pages that you wrote to me; In between the letters lies A secret that I'm meant to see; It has been a season Since I have seen the sea, But we can go there soon, If you hurry— We can go there soon, If you come back to me. When I sit and sip my tea, You're facing me... You: a day, a month, a year ago— It's all the same to me. On every bus I see On every street I see In every passing pair of shoes I see... You. You can see me too, If you hurry... You can see me too, If you come back...
4.	Fall 05:27	lyrics	buy track
I saw you again For the first time in ages You looked just the same But you sounded so different Your manner of speaking and The tone of your voice Were so changed. If I were a bird I’d have fluttered away But as I don’t have wings I was required to stay In my place at the register Ringing you up In the most awkward way In that stupid café... I saw you again For the first time in ages You looked just the same But you sounded so different Your manner of speaking and The tone of your voice Were so changed. And I’d never seen that shirt before And I’d never seen that bag before And I shouldn’t want to see you more Often, but I do... And I’d never seen that scarf before And I’d never seen that hat before And I shouldn’t want to see you more Often, but I do, I do, I do... It’s been a whole year. It’s been twelve whole months. The innumerable minutes— I counted each one. In a manner of speaking I still really love you And I can’t get you, can’t get you Out of my head. I’ve spent all this time In extensive reflection And in my recollection The things that I said Were gratuitous In their emotional content And I’m sorry If saying them scared you away. I shouldn’t have acted the way that I acted I shouldn’t have called you I should have retracted The things that I said At the moment I said them Or better yet I should’ve never been born. I should have retracted The things that I said At the moment I said them I shouldn’t have called you I shouldn’t have acted the way that I acted I need to be punished I need to be punished I need to be punished I need to be punished... Every thought inside my head Is suddenly exploding; Every object in my room Is suddenly too dull; Everything I feel inside my heart Is fully inappropriate; Every object in my room Is suddenly too dull... There’s only a window there Only a window there Only a window, only a window (You can do it you can do it you can do it you can do it) There’s only a window, only a window, only a window, only a window there… There’s only a window there Only a window there Only a window, only a window (You can do it you can do it you can do it you can do it) There’s only a window, only a window, only a window, only a window there… ... There’s only a window there Only a window there Only a window, only a window (You can do it you can do it you can do it you can do it) There’s only a window, only a window, only a window, only a window there… There’s only a window there Only a window there Only a window, only a window (You can do it you can do it you can do it you can do it) There’s only a window, only a window, only a window, only a window there… There’s only a window there Only a window there Only a window, only a window (You can do it you can do it you can do it you can do it) There’s only a window, only a window, only a window, only a window there… I close my eyes and In my memories, I’m drowning in your coat; I’m gathering the leaves that fall... In my memories, I’m drowning in your coat... I’m just jumping in the leaves that fall....
5.	Firecracker 03:57	lyrics	buy track
Blue-, blue-, blue-eyed Scruffy fella— Helicopters buzzed against Our cheeks and ears and necks and Turned us all around In terms of color: Blushing, queasy, spinning And irrevocably endearing Drinking fountains, puppies, penguins, Little lambs… Don’t you dare go Making me like you more; I hate you more and more Every second I’m with you; Every second you’re making me like you More and more, I hate you more I hate you more. Firecrackers have no choice: The fuse gets lit, The voice comes shooting out In sparks and sparkles— And a minute Lasts a lifetime, Lasts a heartbeat, Never lasts for sixty seconds Like it should— And no matter what It’s never long enough— But it’s still good. True, true, true, I would Be your boyfriend If you’d be mine, But this whole situation is Becoming so ridiculous— Mr. Potato Heart— Indeed, it seems You lack a few essential pieces; Would it be taboo for me To skip-bo right past go, Play operation and connect for good The clues to cure this sorry state of Constant aggravation? Don’t you dare go Pushing my love away If you’re gonna just Pick up the slack and Pull it right back In a stupid kind of tug-of-war game That I don’t wanna play— Unless I’m on your side, In which case I’ll be with you all the way. Firecrackers have no choice: The fuse gets lit, The voice comes shooting out In sparks and sparkles— And a minute Lasts a lifetime, Lasts a heartbeat, Never lasts for sixty seconds Like it should— And no matter what It’s never long enough— I could go a day without you I could go a hundred days But I’d spread those hundred days Out over a century If that’s okay with you Sometimes I get the feeling I’m just on display— Like some little punk’s been Pressing against me, Setting me off for a Pyrotechnicolorful Don’t you dare go Don’t you dare go Don’t you dare go Don’t you dare go Don’t you dare go Don’t you dare go Setting me off and Running away When I’ve got something I still want to say… Again! Firecrackers have no choice: The fuse gets lit, The voice comes shooting out In sparks and sparkles— And a minute Lasts a lifetime, Lasts a heartbeat, Never lasts for sixty seconds Like it should— And no matter what It’s never long enough— And no matter what— It’s never long enough— But it’s still so oh oh oh-oh-oh good!
6.	Made in Vermont 01:38	lyrics	buy track
Hermit was sleeping And dreaming Just like the maple syrup That was seeping So sweetly From the tree In which he was Soothed by the buzz Of a hundred honey bees Returning to the hollow From a red clover field Something’s sure sweet about that tree Something’s sure sweet about that Fuzzy warm reality It’s good enough for squirrels So it’s good enough for me I’m not aware of any substitute that I could ever want There’s no comparison, I’ve found the real deal Made in Vermont…
7.	Paid By Weight 04:04	lyrics	buy track
Someday, Maybe ten, maybe twenty years from now, There will be a knock at your door. There will be a man standing there with a clipboard. And you will sign your name on the dotted line. The man will hand over A parcel bundled up in wool. You will look down to consider it; You will look up to say thanks, And the man will be gone... But a plaintive cry will draw your eyes To a baby pelican Sitting on your welcome mat, And the pelican’s eyes will dilate, And the eyes of the trees will dilate, And you will be a sea anemone: You will contract upon this contact. Will you feel small? And will you feel scared? And will you gasp for air And find there’s nothing there But a fatal mistake? Will you finally weigh what you have given Against what You take and you take and you take and you take. Somehow, You will think once again of the package in your hands You will begin to tug at the wool. It will come off easily in pieces, But it will cut right through the prints upon your fingers and It will pile up around you in a mountain of gauze In a car on a hospital train, Where the surgeons lack credentials And the scalpels are just saws. But a plaintive cry will draw your eyes To a baby pelican Sitting on your welcome mat, And the pelican’s eyes will dilate, And the eyes of the trees will dilate, And you will be a sea anemone: You will contract upon this contact. Will you open your arms To the birds? Will you open your arms To the trees? Will you repast them With your own blood? Will you finally give back The breath that you take? (and you take and you take and you take. You take and you take and you take and you take.) Somewhere, Underneath the many years of stinging fibers, You will find your gift. Will you ever understand what it means?
8.	Immunodeficiency 02:05	lyrics	buy track
Trouble is, Nowadays, We go walking in the rain Protected by our plastic parasols. From the mists To the waves, We don't think we ever will implode again, The mighty leaden rollers rushing in to kill us all. But the ships are swiftly sinking, And the submarine in which I am Sequestering myself Is failing to produce a proper answer. I'm thinking to myself, I'm telling me that deftly I'll be Giving my advice to all the world, that The cells we're in are splitting So it's looking like It's likely that it's cancer. You looked sweet Standing there, Smiling at me sleepily Suspiciously like someone who is dead. Shake the sheets, Let 'em air, We'll go down in history Conspicuously grinning like the cat who's in the story life we've led. And the ships are softly sighing As the sedimental seafloor says A prayer to bring them home And sings a sullen cradle song of death. I'm thinking to myself, I'm telling me that certainly we Haven't got the heart to tell the world that The tumors are malignant, So the time is coming When we'll breathe our last breath. From the start, Where was I? I was not the kind of guy To look a fading flower in the eye. Cross your heart, Hope to die, Hope to soon be sailing smoothly heaven-high, Surrounded by the seabirds as they skim the starless sky.
9.	The Song I Didn't Write 01:22	lyrics	buy track
I can’t wrap my head around The notion that the present is a gift. You know me well enough by now To know I know that your devotion Has a tendency to shift. I can wait for you forever If that’s what you want. I can be a fountain for you Always filling, always spilling. I burnish every surface in the house But still I’m haunted by the dust. How much of it is your skin? How could I begin again? You know the words to all my songs And you prove it to me every night. But could you guess the lyrics To the song I didn’t write?
10.	One-Way Sea 03:42	lyrics	buy track
You tell me that the boat is moving forward— Whatever that means when there is no land in sight. I’d always pegged you as a shorebird— But in light of certain facts, I’m inclined to take it back. Don’t underestimate me; This field of research is my specialty, my specialty! I will crack this hierarchy If it is the death of me, The death of me! The death of me… You tell me we are sailing on a one-way sea— I nod my head and hold my tongue. (You are an idiot!) You gave me a bum steer, crowing of your lofty views; I might have known you were A rooster in a booster seat! Don’t underestimate me! (Clearly there’s no danger of my underestimating you!) I will commandeer this vessel If it is the death of you, The death of you! —Must you respond so saltily? My faculties… Have long been… Bursting at the seams… Brimming as they are… With onomies, And ologies, And Memories! Memories! Memories! Memories! Don’t esterundimate me! I will hack this crierarchy! —Cut me, please—a little slack, I mean— Mental tacking’s never been my specialty. My knack is for a marked lack of strategy. But spin around and take another whack at me Look back at me — and see! I will stack up properly! If it is the death of me, The death of me, The death of me, The death of me!
11.	Resurrection 04:01	lyrics	buy track
Rain falls down, And the rain compresses all the sounds into the ground. When the clutter goes away like this, The silence can be found. A silent color guard routine Flows forth from the flowers as they sing. Do you see? The stamina are heavy, But the filaments are glistening. And this is why we need the rain. The raindrops falling on my head must remain, Because the leaves and debris are clogging up the drain to my brain — But a creek can carve a canyon, So I’m counting on a clean cut to christen me. I need the rain. Do you ever wonder why the rain was invented? Was it to put puddles where the streets have been dented, So we’ll have a place to play When we’ve had a lousy day? Nah, it was probably to melt the snow. Nah, it was probably to help the rivers flow. Nah, it was probably to soak the seeds we sow. Nah, it was probably to make the wild things grow. Nah, it was probably to give us all a show. Nah, it was probably to sooth the winds that blow. Nah, it was probably to let us know There’s something out there even when were all alone And if we listen real close We can maybe hear the tapping of its toes… I had lost myself, but I came back around. And I memorized the map before it seeped into the ground. I need the rain.
12.	Japanese Garden / Jardin japonais / Японский сад 06:01	lyrics	buy track
To read lyrics with English translations of the French and Russian sections, please go to my website: http://www.stephannance.com/Lyrics.html [...] breaking through the ice, I scuttle down the riverbank till I espy the arboretum in your house… in your home… and covered in mud, I crawl into a carapace, and down the hallway you, the coniferous buoy bobbing on alpha waves, inspire a siren song, compose a nodding poem that will never see the light of day that will never see the light (but I) read in a dream Japanese garden head on the shoulder Japanese maple read in a dream Japanese garden head on the shoulder Japanese maple read in a dream… read in a dream… crossing crooked bridges, safe to knit you any garment now, but I cast off my crafty armaments, I cast you aside and I scoot away but didn’t we ditch those demons? are we not free to freeze and thaw as we please? to perch on branches whittled into benches built for human shivering un cœur en hiver un cœur qui ne verra jamais la lumière (mais je) lis dans un rêve jardin japonais tête sur épaule érable du Japon je lis dans un rêve jardin japonais tête sur épaule érable du Japon je lis dans un rêve… lis dans un rêve… everything will be simple someday soon everything will be simple, oh so simple everything will be simple someday soon… Простите мне, что я решился к вам писать. Перо в руке— вырезано имя на стволе. Меня кожа покраснела на свекольном красителе Вы меня поймали с поличным, читающего во сне; Ирландца, ходящего в шотландке, я люблю! Неразумно, но безмерно— я люблю! Относительно дополнительной сосновой шишки— Я не беру в голову, не беру в голову. Собственно я вырою уютную яму ему. Очевидно, язык мой — враг мой. А языка чужого я не опасаюсь; не боюсь укрепиться в густолиственном лесу! Тучи собираются над мной, а я пережду грозу— и как только вы дадите оценку я дам вам компенсацию, и секретно, в карман пальто, окаменелую незабудку... [...] I don’t want to be forgotten I don’t want to be forgotten I don’t want to be forgotten anymore anymore denuding adamant layers I peel past a period of interregnum and inherit the gilt cardboard crown from the downy-crested phoenix— my predecessor in this queue of panels in triptychs painted and pruned. the kingdom’s a sham; Hamlet without the Prince— and though a tree you may well be, I am not convinced. copper head on hickory shoulder, curled under covers, a fetal web of words… read in a dream Japanese garden copper head on hickory shoulder breaking through the ice— un cœur en hiver…
13.	Song for Losers 04:09	lyrics	buy track
I’m a pretty good guy— I scrub behind my ears each morning, And I floss every night. I care about the environment— Nowadays people seem to admire that— And yet, It’s so hard to find a friend… If you don’t drink, If you don’t smoke, If you don’t wanna poke Everything with a pulse, You’re a loser, A disaster, They’re perpetually telling you to grow up faster. Well, if that’s what it takes to be cool, Someone needs to change the rules. I’m impossibly kind— I’ll never ever forget your birthday, And I’ll always care what’s on your mind. I’ll go with you to the fair— And maybe if we’re lucky I can win you a bear— So where Is someone when I need someone there? If you don’t drink, If you don’t smoke, If you don’t wanna poke Everything with a pulse, You’re a loser, A disaster, They’re perpetually telling you to grow up faster. Well, if that’s what it takes to be cool, Someone needs to change the rules. I am a vegan, And I ride my bicycle whenever I can. I’ve got a feeling I could save the world— If I had someone to help me… Outside on every street I pass a multitude of people That I’d never wanna meet— As they stagger to a place where they’ll carouse all night, I just wanna cry and yell at them with all my might, I just wanna stop and tell them that it’s not okay For them to fritter every second of their life away like that! I wanna say, hey! Why can’t you see? You don’t know what a party is Till you’ve hung out with me… We can dance through the puddles in the empty streets We can warm up and cuddle in between the sheets We can make popcorn on the stove We can watch X-men Parts one, two, and/or three… If you don’t drink, If you don’t smoke, If you don’t wanna poke Everything with a pulse, You’re a loser, A disaster, They’re perpetually telling you to grow up faster. Well, if that’s what it takes to be cool, Someone needs to change the rules, Send me back to elementary school So I can play all day in my kiddy pool, Never have to worry about how buff I’m not, Never have to worry about how tough I’m not, and Maybe I won’t even notice whether I am loved or not— I dunno. I dunno, I dunno… I don’t know what to do. I’m in a quandary It’s clear I need somebody But I cannot seem to find out who… And if they’re anything like me, It’s likely that this person would be tricky to see, So if you do, Would you please refer them to me? ‘Cause I don’t drink… And I don’t smoke… But I could brighten up Your day with a joke— If you let me… Once you’ve met me, Maybe I can make it so you never want to forget me… Maybe we could change the rules.

credits

released July 23, 2012

All songs written by Stephan Nance
Produced by Matt Greco & Stephan Nance
Engineered, mixed, & mastered by Matt Greco
Recorded at MGRECORDS, Eugene, Oregon and Sprout City Studios, Eugene, Oregon

Keyboards & vocals: Stephan Nance
Cello / melodica: Angelica Sather Hodgetts
Percussion: Merlin Showalter
Bass / guitar / trumpet: Tim McLaughlin
Bass on "Song for Losers" and "Japanese Garden": Milo Fultz

Artwork by Rebecca DeMoss
Graphic design & layout by Parker Williams

Published by Stephan Nance, ASCAP

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Sparkbird Portland, Oregon

Sparkbird, a.k.a. Stephan Nance. Chamber folk-pop. Pronouns: they/them.
Booking/sync/licensing/inquiries: music@stephannance.com

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